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Kingsley Ughelumba, father of Super Eagles and Fulham defender Calvin Bassey, has once again made a heartfelt public appeal to reconcile with his son and other children after nearly 18 years of separation.
Ughelumba, who first spoke about his estrangement two years ago, described his ongoing pain, saying he has been “dying in silence” and desperately hopes for an opportunity to reconnect with his children.
The father, who hails from Ihiala Local Government Area in Anambra State, shared details of his family background. His first three sons—Elvis, Mathew, and Calvin—were born in Italy, while his youngest, Michael, was born in Ireland. The family lived together briefly in London, but marital issues eventually led to separation.
“We had husband-and-wife arguments. I went to work, and before I returned, she had left with the children,” Ughelumba said in an interview with Punch.
He recounted a brief period of contact in 2017, when his children needed Nigerian passports. “I sent all my documents and bought all their flight tickets. When they stayed with me then, I never told them their mum did anything to me. She has muted me since he signed for a football club.”
Since that brief reunion, Ughelumba says he has been unable to see or communicate freely with his children. “I have not seen my children for a long time,” he said, visibly emotional.
He also shared several failed attempts to reconnect. During the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, he drove from London to Leicester, where Calvin was playing, hoping to see his first son. “I wasn’t looking for him because he was a footballer; I wanted to see my son,” he said. But without contact details and with his ex-wife blocking access, his efforts were unsuccessful.
Ughelumba described a poignant encounter at Leicester City: “The club called Calvin using a nickname I had for him when he was little—‘Biggy.’ He responded immediately. I got his address, but when he saw me, he called his mum, got upset, and told me to say whatever I wanted and leave. He didn’t want to see me again.”
In 2023, he even traveled from Italy to Abidjan during the Africa Cup of Nations, hoping to meet his son once more. “During the Nigeria vs Angola match, a journalist helped link me with the football federation. They gave me tickets, and I watched the match. After that, I went to Abuja to try again, but I still didn’t see him,” he said.
Ughelumba stressed that his struggle is not with his children, but with their mother. “Even if I am a devil, I can’t be a devil where my children are. I have been dying in silence,” he said.
Meanwhile, Calvin Bassey, now 26, has enjoyed a rapidly rising football career. He joined Dutch side Ajax in July 2022 in a deal worth €23 million, the highest transfer fee in Rangers’ history at the time. A year later, he signed for English Premier League club Fulham for €22 million. He made his Nigeria debut in March 2022 during the World Cup play-off against Ghana and has since earned 43 caps, establishing himself as a key defender in recent Africa Cup of Nations tournaments.
Before making a name for himself in senior football, Bassey was often listed under his father’s surname, Ughelumba. However, as his career progressed, he adopted his mother’s surname, crediting her for her support. Reflecting on his upbringing, Bassey said:
“He’s just not in my life — we lived with him, but that was when I was really young. Since I was six, it has been mum and us boys. I knew that if I got the chance to put my name on the back of a shirt, I wanted it to be my mum’s name—my way of saying thank you.”
Ughelumba’s emotional appeals highlight the enduring challenges of family estrangement and the desire of a father to reconnect with his children, despite years of separation.
