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Nigerian photographer and storyteller, Fati Abubakar, has spoken out against the age-shaming of women, particularly from men who feel slighted after being rejected.
In a Facebook post on Monday, Abubakar questioned the tendency of some men to insult women by calling them “old” simply because they’re in their 30s.
“It’s strange how when you reject men, they start calling you old,” she wrote. “They hurl insults and bitterness. I don’t understand the age-shaming.”
Abubakar stressed that ageing is both natural and beautiful. “We will all grow old. To me, being older means being wiser, more secure in yourself, and capable of making informed decisions. You begin to see through manipulation and recognize narcissism more easily. That kind of wisdom is priceless.”
She went on to challenge the notion that wealth alone qualifies someone for marriage.
“I hope men begin to understand that simply having money, a house, or a car doesn’t make you husband material,” she said.
Ending on a reflective note, she advised men to seek healing and self-awareness: “No matter how much of a ‘spec’ you think you are, you may never be someone’s cup of tea. I hope you seek Islamic counseling to better understand the rights and responsibilities in marriage before taking that step.”
